Sunday, August 18, 2013

The Midnight Train

That's where my thoughts start, stop, get derailed, and eventually crash. It's been two months plus some days since I posted last. I think about it, usually around midnight as I'm trying to drift off to sleep. At that point, there's usually a wee one attached to me and typing isn't a possibility. This happens night after night and I think, "I haven't _____ in a long time." The blank might be: written, read, clipped my nails or any other number of things I don't have much time to do. More often than not, I just don't have two free hands. I know people who only have one hand must be able to do things, but being used to having two, I can't figure it out.
I sat down to write this earlier. I had starts and stops and finally, just ate a handful of Cheerios and went with it. There are probably multiple Cheerios on the floor now…
There have been a lot of things in the news this summer that I have thoughts on. Summer itself is a head scratcher. Exactly when, in North Carolina, have there been consecutive nights in August where air conditioning isn't needed because it's so cool outside? I don't remember a time. When I was a kid, we didn't have a/c until I was in about 7th grade, though. We used to roll those windows open and let the hot dust fly in. Yes, North Carolina in the heat of summer on a dirt road…I don't miss those days at all. I digress.
The things I've paid most attention to are the egregious actions of my home state's governor and legislature. Education has been slashed like Edward Scissorhands' most recent shrub. Wet-behind-the-ears youngsters who supported our guvna have received pay raises over $25k, though. Voting rights have been targeted. Women's rights have been targeted. It's as if I'm living in the state in the decades before I was even born. I read a quote the other day; I don't remember the source, which sums up the war on women's rights. "Roe v Wade was not the beginning of abortions. It was the end to women dying from abortions." I think it's atrocious that our officials want to put us back at least 40 years.
I used to love residing in NC. I liked being southern. I don't anymore. I'm embarrassed. I'm concerned for the children of this state who aren't wealthy enough for private education, including my own. I'm concerned for women who find themselves in the horrific situation of an unwanted pregnancy. By the way, adoption is not an alternative to pregnancy. It's an alternative to parenting. I struggled to have a living, healthy child. I still don't think anyone should have the right to tell me what to do with my uterus. Nevertheless, I am stuck here for the foreseeable future thanks to the economy. I can't just pick up and move to a more progressive, education-appreciating state.
For now, I'll watch the news with hopes of Moral Mondays growing and showing these officials that they do NOT speak for all of us, or even the majority of us. Polls are showing that. I will love, nurture and raise this beautiful baby boy by whom my husband and I have been so richly blessed. I will continue to work. I will continue to chip away at Mt. Clothesmore on my days off and I will continue to have my random thoughts aboard the midnight train to dreamland.

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