Dates and I'm Not Talking Fruit

Happy Labor Day!  Whatever

Labor Day doesn't really mean anything.  I'm heading to work in a couple of hours.  We just went grocery shopping and it was an effing madhouse.  No one takes a break.  Besides that, it means something otherwise to me.

Tomorrow would have been my Due Date.  There's a big, ol' fat circle on the calendar, but no baby is coming.  If you've been around, you know I miscarried in late January.  It seems a really long time ago, but it kind of seems not so long ago some days.  As if the past week hasn't been traumatic enough, this has to fall in the same time frame.

The whole yin yang thing is bullshit.  There is no balance in my universe.  I seriously think I have some kind of weird barometer inside and I make my own atmosphere.  I have an innate black cloud.  Everything and everyone I touch turns to a steaming pile.

I'm not holding a pity party.  No sympathy seeking here.  I would, however, love it if something really awesome happened and didn't disappear almost instantaneously.  Maybe I should join the carnies at the fair next month.  I could just travel and eat elephant ears all year.  How could that end badly?