There's always good and bad in any situation. Sometimes, it's easier to see one or the other. I am not a pessimist by nature, but for some situations, I do see bad before good. With relationships and family, it's where I immediately go.
I love my husband. That should seem obvious. I love this baby boy who's kung fu fighting in my abdomen right now. For both of them, whenever there's a little glitch, I expect the worst. I possibly even perseverate on the worst possibilities. For example, my last ultrasound gave us a 4D image of Emory. I stared at it and stared at it until I decided his eyes looked wide spaced. Then, I researched syndromes with wide spaced eyes. The doc we saw that day said "baby looks great". He saw the same photos I did. He actually knows what he's seeing, but I didn't trust it. I'm past that now and am trusting that said doctor would have clearly indicated concern that he saw such things if he did.
I think when you've experienced a significant loss, or three or four or however many I'm up to now, it colors your perspectives. I think it may even be easier to expect disappointment than to expect happiness. The key is realizing that's what's happening and getting past it.
This is a work in progress for me. I see good and bad. I need to go over the hump and get back to the good.
I'm getting there.